Funny People Are Sad Too
In fact, I’m going to go on a limb here: if you haven’t been seriously disenfranchised, dealt with immense loss or suffering, or a thrilling combination of the two, you probably aren’t very funny.
And honestly, that’s ok. Can you imagine how exhausting the world would be if everyone was funny? Newton’s Third Law dictates for every action there’s a reaction. For every funny person there needs to be at least three to four painfully unfunny people. That’s just science.
So go on with your relatively ok life. With all due respect, this post isn’t for you.
Alright, now that everyone who’s ever cried on public transit is here, let’s get on the same page.
You are not required to constantly entertain
As a former thicc kid that grew up into a thicc adult, I spent my teenage years cultivating a sense of humor. Even at that age I knew being either devastatingly attractive or brilliantly intelligent were not going to be my social currency.
The downside of this is a (frankly very dumb) obligation to always be “on”. I feel the need to perform even on the darkest of days and that’s...not it, folks. You can take some vacation time from lighthearted musings and pithy comments. You are not one dimensional. You, in fact, have many dimensions, and most of them are sad right now.
Some days are off days
There are days I’m genuinely trying to be my natural jokey self, and I just bomb. All day. The timing isn’t there, I am not reading the room, and there are a few people behind me in line at Safeway that would like to just go about their day. Acknowledge that you’re sometimes just a few degrees off your game. Take the Ls with certainty that Ws are on the horizon, champ.
Think of all the art you’ll make!
An incredibly well-meaning friend once said to me post breakup, “Look at the bright side: you’ll make so much art!”
While this was not at all what was necessary at the time, they did kind of have a point? You’re not going to be writing your opus when you’re too sad to leave the bed, or high as a kite rewatching all of Arrested Development, but you can channel these extreme emotions into another vehicle. Do little bits at a time. Store snippets for later. Use time spent at the bottom to muse about the absurdity of life.
Know your normal, and know when to ask for help
Some of you may be relatively new to the Sadness Game. Some of you are quite seasoned. Either way, you need to be able to recognize when a situation has evolved out of your control. Using humor to trick family, friends, and medical professionals in your life into thinking you’re doing much better than you are is a slippery slope. Trust me, I’ve been there. You are doing yourself zero favors.
There are resources out there (I’ll link to these at the bottom), and getting help is never a weakness. Rather, it’s strength in self-realization that this isn’t your normal.
While long-term sadness is uncomfortable to talk about and even more uncomfortable to experience, it doesn’t mean the end of the road. You will smile again. You will laugh until you pee again. And you’re still funny, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.